#anyway another thing i want to point out is that all of this that i said about acting is also very relative
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alllgator-blood · 1 day ago
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'FOGGY STREETS AND CHRISTMAS LIGHTS'
(part 3/3)
I'm gonna infodump about the backstory of this comic, don't feel obligated to read it because it's not cotl related it's just personal stuff, I just want to be able to write about it somewhere cause I can't really talk to anyone about it.
As always, thanks for reading this far, sorry my stuff has been such a bummer so consistently. This comic goes out to all my "christmas induced depression" homies, I left my house maybe like ~5 times all month and it was NOT pleasant hearing "IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!" on the radio when I'm so ready for it to be over. Gonna take it reaaaaal easy til the year ends, you guys take it easy too!! Got some asks I have to respond to when I'm more stable but probably no new comic pages til january
Alright uhhh so this part of the comic is pretty much taken directly from the last time I saw my great-grandma alive, a few days before christmas. She didn't remember me, but at the nursing home there was a piano, and I sat down and played some stuff because I didn't know what to say. I was really into lisa the painful rpg at the time, and I played that "I've got the joy" song that the villain sings without realizing it was an old christian campfire song. She didn't really say much or move that whole night, just kind of gave me a polite blank smile, but started singing the words when I played the notes to that song.
I kinda stopped in shock, my dad frantically asked me to keep playing, so I did. While the comic I made is way more sappy than the actual moment was, I wish I'd cherished the moment longer. I didn't know it was the last time I'd see her alive. Every family christmas was held at her house when she was around, so it's been weird the past few years. I actually lost another dementia-addled grandma to cancer on christmas eve in 2009, so the holiday was already kind of weird for me on top of everything else that makes me sad this time of year. That's what part 2 was about, I'll spare the details but I wrote leshy to act out how I felt back then. Why are we all sad? This is supposed to be a happy time, all the decorations are up and we're almost all here, so why is everyone smiling yet everything feels so wrong? I feel like since leshy's canonically the most ignorant one to things lurking below the surface, he'd be the one to try and make everyone feel better but not quite understand why everyone is so miserable. My first memory of having self injurious behavior came from then, hence why I had leshy pull his leaves off in the last comic. It was confusing and frustrating and I was just old enough to comprehend something was wrong, but not old enough to understand the depth of it, it DEFINITELY didn't help that nobody helped me back then so I made leshy's siblings actually come in clutch instead of grabbing him/yelling at him.
That night with the piano was something that's stuck with me the few years she's been gone, but I felt kind of strange when I asked my dad and my sister about it and neither of them remembered it. The room we were in was completely empty so nobody else witnessed it but us three. I myself have a history of head trauma and memory loss (plus, native americans are disproportionately more likely to develop dementia... lucky us) so if I ever forgot about that moment, there'd be nobody left to remember it. Sometimes when I do comics, it's my way of going "this happened at some point, and the only evidence it ever happened was me witnessing it, so if something happens to me I want the memory to stay alive in some form."
Anyway. The autistic urge to overshare, am I right? Idk what my religious ass great-grandma would think of me drawing demonic comics about my last memory of her, she'd probably think it's funny though cause she raised my dad whose interests have always been "death metal and devil worship". I'm not sure if anyone read this far, I just hope my dumb comics can convey the things I can't say with my voice and struggle to say through text. None of this was supposed to be "feel bad for me!! Woe is me!!", it was supposed to me more like...cathartic? Healing? I almost didn't post this comic because it felt kinda weird, but seeing people connect with it made it worth it imo. Thank you
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sammakesart · 1 day ago
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Castles in the Fade, or What Was the Point of the Veil Anyway
Something that will now haunt me until the end of time is why was the concept of the Veil ever introduced into this series.
We’ve been hearing about it since the very first game. There’s a codex entry about tears in the Veil in Origins. Tamlen mentions a thin spot in the Veil if you play a Dalish elf. Sandal has a prophecy in Dragon Age 2: “One day the magic will come back—all of it. Everyone will be just like they were. The shadows will part and the skies will open wide. When he rises, everyone will see.” Admittedly, this is just one line said by a character who often says odd things, but it hinted to the fact they were planning to do something with the Veil from the very beginning. The state of the Veil is repeatedly brought up. It all had to mean something! Or so I thought. 
When I saw “The Dread Wolf Rises” quest in Veilguard, I said, “Oh, here we go!” The Veil is coming down, magic is coming back, and it’s going to set up such an interesting story for the next game. 
Alas, no. 
I hadn’t really enjoyed my time playing Veilguard up until this point. It felt like the game was ducking and dodging every bit of world building and lore that could possibly bring nuance or complexity to the story. Every returning character or faction was a cardboard cutout of themself. They shoved Solas is a time-out box and gave him nothing to do. They refused to let him have any impact or influence on the story when he had been set up to be our main antagonist back in Trespasser. This game used to be called Dreadwolf! And while we learn about his past… we never talk to him about it. In the present, he’s in stasis.
Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain are our villains. And they are your typical evil for evil’s sake villains. They are mad, bad, and only as dangerous as the narrative will allow as to not give Rook and co too much trouble. They are surprisingly patient while Rook fixes all their companions’ problems… until Elgar’nan moves the moon to cause an eclipse. A vital component in making his own lyrium dagger. For some reason. This guy can move a satellite!? And he just let Rook walk away in previous encounters… twice. Ok. Sure.
The Evil Duo need their own dagger ostensibly to tear down the Veil, because they want to unleash the full force of the Blight onto the world. Because they are evil. And they were thwarted last time they tried to Blight the entire world. Why do they think Blighting the world is a good idea? What’s the point of ruling a world if everyone is dead? I guess they haven’t thought that through, because of the madness and the evilness.
Ok, I thought. Perhaps the gods will be the one to tear down the Veil. Or maybe we’ll have a choice to let Solas do it his way before they can, which will be less chaotic and less full of Blight. Because the Veil has to be coming down one way or another? Why introduce the concept of the Veil, especially a Veil that has been thinning and failing since the series began, if it’s just going to… stay.
There is a principle in storytelling called Chekov’s gun. If something is mentioned in a story, it must have a purpose. If you keeping mentioning that gun hanging on the wall over the fireplace, it’s because at some point in the story, someone is going to take it down and use it. The Veil felt like Chekov’s gun to me. Chekov’s Veil, if you will. It’s been here from the beginning of our tale, the spectre hanging over our protagonists’ heads for multiple games.
The Veil has been a character unto itself. It was the central focus of the third game, and its dissolution was set up to be the core conflict of the fourth game. We learn everything we thought we knew about the Veil was a lie. It was not created by the Maker to separate the Fade from this world because of jealous spirits, it was created by a guy named Solas to trap the elven gods and the Blight from destroying the world. Also, the elven gods were never gods, and they are also evil.
This reveal will surely throw the Andrastian religion into chaos! This puts the very existence of the Maker into question! The Evanuris are a lie; it’s only fair Catholicism—oh, I mean—the Chantry is a lie too. We briefly touch on that in Veilguard… then it is quietly discarded. Religious crisis averted.
But I digress.
When the title of the fourth game was changed from Dreadwolf to Veilguard, I started to see the writing on the wall. Still, I held out hope the Veil would have some greater purpose in the story. That its introduction as a concept was for a reason. That something in this world would change.
Instead, from the get-go, the question of the Veil is no question at all. We only get Solas and Varric making oblique or catastrophizing statements about it. Solas says little beyond he has a plan. If I ever wanted to hear a villain monologue about their plan, it was now! Varric, on the other hand, decries Solas’s plan. He warns that should the Veil fall, it will destroy the world and drown it in demons. And that’s that.
We never really learn why Solas wants to tear the Veil down, or why he thinks it will help anyone. “The Veil is a wound inflicted upon this world. It must be healed,” he says. And that’s basically all he says about it in Veilguard. In Inquisition and Trespasser, we learn it took the immortality from the elves. It cut most of magic off from the world. Spirits are trapped and are being corrupted into demons, and most of what we know about spirits and demons is wrong. There are ancient elves possibly asleep? That part is left vague, but ancient elves are still about. We meet some in Mythal’s temple. There seems to have been some merit in bringing it down, because elves were flocking to Solas’s cause at the end of Trespasser. He had agents working for him already. What do they know that we don’t know?
Apparently nothing, because by the time Veilguard rolls around, there are no mention of agents. He is working alone. His only motivation now seems to be he’s too deep in his sunk-cost fallacy. The Veil is unnatural, so it must be removed—consequences be damned. We are never given any reason to think Solas has a leg to stand on in his pursuit of tearing down the Veil. We never hear any kind of counter argument from anyone, not even Solas, as to why the Veil should come down. We are only told it will destroy the world. It will drown the world in demons. This is all Solas’s fault.
There is no nuance. No complexity. No moral quandary to mull over. The game gives us vague warnings with no explanation as to what exactly is so world-annihilating about the Veil coming down. We must take Varric’s word at face value. We’re the heroes; Solas is the villain. Stop him.
It makes me wonder why Solas was ever a companion in Inquisition, let alone a romance option. Solas was presented to us as a complicated character in Inquisition. We had the potential throughout the game to make him see the value of this world, to help him realize he was wrong about it. “We aren’t even people to you,” the Inquisitor says in Trespasser. Solas replies, “Not at first. You showed me that I was wrong...again.” He began the third game viewing the world as tranquil, seeing the people in it as nothing more than figments in a nightmare, just as we saw our companions in the In Hushed Whispers quest. He ends the game having made friends, having recognized he was mistaken. He might have even fallen in love. (Or he may still seen no merit in this world if the Inquisitor antagonized him the entirety of their time together.) But something makes him continue with his plan to tear down the Veil, despite recognizing this world is real. He must know something we don’t. Something we’ll learn about in the next game.
We’ve been hearing about the Veil for three games now. We’ve set up our complex antivillain for the next installment, and he’s going to tear the Veil down. We swear to stop him or save him. But it has to be more complex than that. It can’t be so straightforward. Uncomplicated. Simple. Boring. Right? Right?
Nope. He really is just the villain, mustache-twirling and all. He apparently had no greater motivation, no as of yet unrevealed knowledge that would put this whole Veil thing into a new context. It was really as simple as the Veil falling will destroy the world, so Solas must be stopped. There is no new information that is revealed which makes us question what we are doing. Solas is never given any nuance or complexity to his actions. Nuance and complexity have actively been taken away. Both him and the Veil are looking like they are the worst things to be in a story: pointless. Why introduce the Veil if it’s just going to remain unchanged? Why introduce a character like Solas, bother humanizing him (for lack of a better term), giving us his backstory, setting him up as a cunning antagonist, only to make him look stupid, then put him on a shelf until the last ten minutes of your game?
Solas was the trickster archetype of this tale. He was our version of Loki from Norse mythology. What is the role of the trickster archetype? To challenge the status quo. To bring about events of extreme change, like say, the tearing down of a Veil that holds back all of magic. Loki is a huge contributing factor in Ragnarök. Through his manipulation, he causes the death of the beloved god, Baldr. This ushers in a long winter, which signifies the beginning of the end. Loki is imprisoned for this crime. When the final battle between gods and giants begins, the sun and moon are swallowed, plunging the earth into darkness. The earth shakes and Loki is freed to fight on the side of the giants. The world burns in raw chaos, falls beneath the sea, and is reborn. The world is remade, and a new realm of the gods and a new, better earth is formed.
It really felt like this was the setup they were going for. Solas causes the death of Mythal, and this is his catalyst for creating the Veil, which ushers in a world without magic. This could be seen as equivalent to the long winter. Solas falls asleep, trapped in dreams. He wakes and sets in motion bringing about the apocalypse. It’s not a perfect one to one, but it’s there if you squint. We have a war against the gods in Veilguard. I was expecting a few remaining Titans to wake and join the fight. But we don’t get any of that. There is a final battle, but it does not end in the end of the world. Or a better world. It just ends, and everything is the same.
It seems our trickster god caused his apocalypse thousands of years before our story started, when he created the Veil. His role in this tale was over before ours began, and he really is just some relic from a long-past age. He has no role, no purpose in this story. He is here to be thwarted. He is no Loki at all.
If you can’t tell, I wanted the Veil to come down. Did I think the Veil coming down would be painless? Have no negative consequences? No. Of course not. But keeping it up has negative consequences too. And it made for an interesting story. Or at least it could have. But we never explore that. The game presents no counter argument to having the Veil stay up, which, again, begs the question: what was the point of introducing the concept of the Veil at all?
Did I think the Veil coming down was actually the best solution to help Thedas become a better place? I don’t know, and I never will, because the game never argues for it one way or another. It just tells you to want it in place and to stop asking questions. In real life, a catastrophic event is not the best way to solve any of the world’s problems. But this is the realm of fiction. We have gods and monsters, magic and myth. We have introduced the status quo of Thedas, recognized it needs to change, then our trickster god appears ready to fulfill his role in the narrative. 
Instead, it all comes to nothing.
I got to the end of Veilguard… and everything was more or less the same as it was at the start of Origins. Veilguard actually tries its hardest to pretend any previously mentioned problems don’t exist, so of course the Veil coming down has no merit. There are no problems to solve in this world, apparently. Solas is just stuck in the past and can’t get with the times. Silly Solas.
The Veil isn’t even a permanent solution. It wasn’t to begin with. It was some duct tape wrapped around a broken pipe, and we’ve just slapped an extra piece of tape on it. It’s still leaking. It is still unnatural, and will fall eventually one way or another. Large amounts of bloodshed weaken it, so I guess Thedas better achieve world peace real quick to avoid any battles. There were seven super-powered mages holding it together… now there is just one. Ironically, the Veil was going to fall after two more Blights anyway. The Wardens were doing Solas’s work for him! It would also have released the full force of the Blight at that time… which Solas was trying to avoid, I presume.
It feels like keeping the Veil up just pushed a big problem onto Thedas’ future generations. We’ll keep slapping bandaids on it until it all falls apart. Someone else can deal with the fallout, but we’ll be dead by then, so who cares.
Primarily, I wanted the Veil to come down from a storytelling perspective. The Veil was an interesting concept and I wanted the story to do something interesting with it. Conflict is what makes stories stories and the Veil coming down could create so much compelling and complex conflict. And the Fade is weird, and I like weird. Stories are also about change, and I wanted to see Thedas change. Yet, Veilguard is over, and barely anything has changed. Instead of magic coming back being a conflict for the next game, they went with Fantasy Illuminati. Oh.
The Veil turned out to be a nothing-burger, and no problems in this world are even close to being solved. Slavery is still rampant in Tevinter. The elven people are still oppressed everywhere. Mages have no more rights in the South than they did in Origins. Spirits are still trapped and being corrupted. The Calling still exists, though might be different somehow now? They don’t really get into that. The Chantry’s validity is still not allowed to be questioned. The Blight still exists in some form, but again it’s vague. Oh, and we learn the dwarves have been gravely wronged, and the Titans are still tranquil. At least if you redeem Solas and a romanced Lavellan joins him, they can work together on healing the Blight and helping the Titans. Oh, good. One problem is being acknowledged and some action will be taken. Offscreen. Hurray? Solas doesn’t have a really great track record of fixing problems, so Lavellan is definitely going to need to be there to make sure he doesn’t fuck it up.
For some reason, this game seemed terrified of letting us think about anything for more than two seconds. It shied away from complexity or nuance at every turn. The game is called The Veilguard—ironically, that word is never uttered in the game—but we are given no real motive for guarding the Veil. We’re unquestionably the hero. The villains are uncomplicatedly evil. Save the world… never wonder what you are doing or why.
I wanted the game to make me question if the Veil staying up or coming down was the right choice. I needed to be given a real counter argument. Convince me the alternative would actually be better or worse, because as I mentioned… things suck quite a bit in Thedas already for a lot of people right now. Let the Veil’s fate be a difficult choice to make. If the conflict cannot be what to do about the Veil, it should be am I doing the right thing about the Veil. If the heart of your game is so thin on motive, everything else falls apart around it.
I hoped they were setting up a complex, Thedas-sized existential conflict for this game in Trespasser, but no. I wanted something to happen, but nothing did. 
I want to feel challenged and changed by a story, not left feeling empty. I’m tired of superficial entertainment. I want to sink my teeth into a narrative that doesn’t paint the world in broad strokes of black and white, good and evil, heroes and villains.
Ultimately, I think my issue is why even introduce a concept like The Veil if you’re not going to do anything interesting with it. Or anything at all. What I thought was Chekov’s Veil turned out to just be a MacGuffin. And that’s disappointing.
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hedgehog-moss · 1 day ago
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Pls give recommendations for Odd books 🙏
Here we go, a list of literary oddity :) This post contains majestic spheres, alien taxonomies, cruel subway polytheism, a fourth-dimensional cat, disturbing earthworms, infinite space football, existential mussel terror, a Parisian absurdist time loop, and a picture of a telegraph-pole-man-cheetah. I'm not exactly recommending these books, in the sense that I won't take any complaints if you find them more odd than good, and some of them transcend the concepts of good and bad anyway.
• The Other City, Michal Ajvaz. It's all like this:
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• Contes du demi-sommeil, Marcel Béalu ('Half-asleep tales') —is the book that prompted my post about stories that have no ambition or justification beyond being odd. I'm sad that it hasn't been translated :( One of the tales is about a strange opaline sphere that rolls on the road. It doesn't accelerate when the road becomes a steep slope but continues rolling majestically. At one point it floats away towards the sky. Someone wonders if it was the moon. Someone else says authoritatively "It was an angel's egg." Everyone is reassured by this explanation. The whole thing feels exactly like remembering a dream you had. There is also a man who reads too much and whose body atrophies so only his head is left and his wife puts it in an egg cup for better stability.
• Leonora Carrington— The Skeleton's Holiday, or maybe the Hearing Trumpet. I've read them so long ago but I think the latter is the one with the old ladies and nuns? There's also a guy who was murdered in his bath by a still-life painter because he said there was a carrot in one of his paintings, but it might not have been a carrot? It's hard to remember details from this book without feeling like I might be making them up. Bonus Leonora Carrington painting which kind of feels like a short story:
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• The Codex Seraphinianus, of course. I wish there were more bizarre encyclopaedias out there.
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Also I love this review:
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• Sleep Has His House, Anna Kavan —I really liked the way this book used language; making life feel like a fever dream even more than in Samanta Schweblin's Fever Dream (which I really liked too.)
The eye is checking a record of silence, space; a nightmare, every horror of this world in its frigid and blank neutrality. The actual scope of its orbit depends on the individual concept of desolation, but approximate symbols are suggested in long roving perspectives of ocean, black swelled, in slow undulation, each whaleback swell plated in armour-hard brilliance with the moonlight clanking along it . . .
• The second half of Michael Ende's Neverending Story, where things get stranger! I remember the hand-shaped castle with eyes and the city of amnesiac former emperors and the miserable ugly worms who cry all the time out of shame then create beautiful architecture with their tears...
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• The Gray House, Mariam Petrosyan. This is the one I had in mind when I talked about a 'museum of the strange, but one you wouldn't want to be trapped in after closing time'. Another book that made me feel uncomfortable in a similar (good) way was Edward Carey's Observatory Mansions, the protagonist of which is a man who curates an odd private museum and can't stand the sight of his own hands.
• Oh, speaking of uncomfortable, and hands—He Digs A Hole, by Danger Slater. To me this book was in the more-odd-than-good category but I liked its refusal to have a coherent philosophical meaning. It's about a man who can't sleep so he goes to his garden shed and saws off his hands and replaces them with gardening tools. Then he starts digging a hole. And then it gets weird. (Read at your own discretion if you have a worm phobia; there's some body horror featuring sexually aggressive earthworms. And then it gets disturbing.)
• 17776 — Someone sent me an ask a few years back to recommend this online multimedia narrative to me and I really enjoyed it! Here's the summary, borrowed from the wiki page: Set in the distant future in which all humans have become immortal and infertile, the series follows three sapient space probes that watch humanity play an evolved form of American football in which games can be played for millennia over distances of thousands of miles. The work explores themes of consciousness, hope, despair, and why humans play sports.
• Saint-Glinglin, Raymond Queneau —the author admitted that this book presents some "internal discontinuities." I didn't like it much but I respect the talent it takes to write a novel where everything feels like a random digression, including the key suspenseful scene that matters to the plot. The one digression I loved had to do with the way the narrator is existentially horrified by various sea creatures. It's like he dreads them so much he can't help but think about them when he should be telling a story.
The oyster... This gob of phlegm, this brutal way of refusing the outside world, this absolute isolation, and this disease: the pearl... If I conceptualise them even a little, my terror starts anew. The mussel is even more significant than the oyster and even more immediately admissible in the domain of terror. Let us indeed consider that this little sticky mass whose collective stupidity haunts our piers, consider that it is alive in the same way as a cow. Because there are no degrees in life. There is no more or less. The whole of life is present in every animal. To think that the mussel, that the mussel has, not a conscience, but a certain way of transcending itself: here I am once again plunged into abysses of anxiety and insecurity.
Near the beginning he philosophises about what would happen if a man and a lobster were the only two survivors of the apocalypse. The lobster would break the man's toe and the man would say, "We are the only beings that remain on this devastated Earth, lobster! The only living beings in the universe, struggling alone against the universal disaster, don't you want to be allies?" But the lobster would disdainfully walk away towards the ocean, and "the sight of the inflexible and imperturbable lobster pierces the sky of humanity with its unintelligible claws." (I can't overstate how little this has to do with the rest of the book.)
• Autumn in Beijing, Boris Vian —needless to say the story does not take place in autumn nor in Beijing.* To the extent that it can be said to be "about" something, it's about people trying to build a train station in a desert with tracks that lead nowhere. (I just went on goodreads to check the title, and it's actually called Autumn in Peking in English. I also discovered that it was featured in a list of Books I Regret Reading. I liked this book, but I understand.)
(* French writers love doing this—like when Alphonse Allais said about his 1893 book The Squadron's Umbrella "I chose this title because there aren't any umbrellas of any sort in this volume, and the important notion of the squadron, as a unit of the armed forces, is never brought up at all; in these conditions, hesitating would have been pure madness.")
• The Library at Mount Char, Scott Hawkins—I fear this one makes a little too much sense for this list, but you can't say it isn't weird; and I loved it and recommend it any chance I get.
• The Eleven Million Mile High Dancer, Carol Hill —this book was so wacky and made me laugh. I've not yet managed to successfully recommend it to someone; its brand of odd didn't resonate with the people I know who've read it but that's okay. You could say it's about a woman astronaut whose weird cat disappears into the fourth dimension (or the quantum realm?) and she goes to space to save him—but that makes the book sound more straightforward and less messy than it is. Her cat leaves her a note before he disappears:
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• The Bald Soprano, Ionesco —fun fact, there's a tiny theatre in the Latin Quarter in Paris where this absurdist play has been staged every night for nearly 70 years, with the exact same set design and costumes and everything, like the actors are stuck in a time loop. They celebrated the 20,000th performance this year! There's an actress who has been playing her character for 40 years and said joining this theatre was like joining a religion. I've been going to see this play as a New Year tradition with my best friend since we were 14, so I love it madly, though I wouldn't say it's good, necessarily—the author said it was about "absolutely nothing, but a superior nothing."
• Statuary Gardens; or Les Mers perdues (apparently not translated) by Jacques Abeille. This man is obsessed with weird statues. Unfortunately I find his writing style rather dull—I feel like he takes strange ideas and makes them feel mundane in a bad way...! But his books still have a nice, quiet, oneiric atmosphere, and images that stayed with me, like a solitary gardener trying to grow stone statues in the depleted soil of a walled garden. Here are some illustrations from the second one:
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I'll look into some of the books recommended on my previous post! (and I agree with the people who brought up Cortázar, Borges, and Junji Ito. <3) Some potentially-odd books I have on my to-read list: Clive Barker's Abarat, Goran Petrović's An Atlas Traced by the Sky, Salvador Plascencia's The People of Paper, Jean Ray's Malpertuis; Jan Weiss's The House of a Thousand Floors; Brice Tarvel's Pierre-Fendre.
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demonpiratehuntress · 1 day ago
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bug trouble (Straw Hats + Ace, Law, Kaku)
featuring - Zoro x F!Reader, Ace x F!Reader, Sanji x F!Reader, Luffy x F!Reader, Law x F!Reader, Kaku x F!Reader, Usopp x F!Reader
summary - you ask them to remove a spider because you are afraid.
warnings - none
a/n - im approaching 1k followers, so as a thank you to all of you, whom i greatly appreciate ❤, please let me know what you think i should do as a special event!
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ZORO
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Zoro is woken up from yet another attempted nap by the sound of two very familiar screams. He groans, already knowing what that entails, but forces himself up anyway because one of those screams came from you.
Sure enough, when he walks into the dining area he sees you and Usopp on top of the table, holding onto each other and shaking as you cried. This earned another sigh from the swordsman, who almost didn't want to ask what was going on.
You didn't give him a choice, wailing, "There's a spider on the floor!"
Zoro heaved another sigh. If it was just Usopp, he'd have left him on his own until one of the other crewmembers took pity on him. But it was you as well, and he promised to protect you, so...
"Where is it?"
"There!" Usopp pointed.
"Where?"
"Turn around!"
He turned to the left.
"No, completely around!"
He did a 180, ending up facing the right now.
"Zoro!" You cried. "Take this seriously!"
"I am! But I don't see it!"
You opened your mouth to say something, but stopped short when the massive bug climbed onto the kitchen table with you and the sharpshooter. Usopp promptly fainted, and you screamed and fell off the table.
Now catching sight of the spider, Zoro stalked over and just casually impaled it with one of his swords, before going outside and dropping it into the ocean. When he returned, you got up happily like nothing had happened and ran over to hug him, squeezing him in your arms.
"Thank you!!" You beamed, kissing his cheek before rejoining Usopp and continuing whatever conversation you'd been having with him before the spider came.
"No," Zoro grabbed your wrist and pulled you away, "For that, you have to nap with me."
"You say that like it's a punishment," you laughed.
He did not let you go for the rest of the day.
ACE
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Truth be told, there were a lot of people aboard the Moby Dick that you could ask to get rid of the spider. Literally anyone passing by. But your predicament right now needed Ace specifically, because you were hiding in your bathroom with nothing on but a towel wrapped around your figure.
Someone had heard your cry for Ace and retrieved your boyfriend, who raced to your room when he heard you needed him. He burst into your shared room with misplaced enthusiasm, thinking of a completely different need.
"Ace?" You called, and you sounded like you were scared.
"Baby? What's wrong?" He asked worriedly, rushing over to the door. "Are you okay?"
"No!" You cried, "There's a spider in the room!"
"Huh? A spider?" He repeated, then saw something crawl across the floor. "Babe that thing is huge! You're on your own."
"ACE!" You yelled. "I swear to-"
"Relax, I was kidding," he laughed. "I'll handle it baby. Sit tight."
You had no idea what he did with it, hopefully he threw it overboard, but you opened the bathroom door just a sliver to take a peek. Ace was just coming back into the room, and you watched him approach the door.
"Okay, you can come out now baby," he cooed. "It's gone."
You sighed in relief and opened the door completely, wrapping your boyfriend up in the tightest hug you'd ever given him. Your towel slipped, but you didn't care.
"It was so big," you complained into his neck. "My hero."
He puffed his chest out proudly, engulfing you in his strong arms, "Anything for my pretty baby. But I think I deserve some kisses."
"I think so too," you smiled when you pulled back, then proceeded to pepper kisses all over his face, ending with a deep, slow and loving kiss on his lips.
SANJI
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The moment your scream rang out through the ship, the cook dropped whatever he had been doing to rush to your aid. He was panicked himself upon hearing your cry for help, wondering what had gotten to you while everyone was busy. When he burst into your room, you were on your bed, curled up in the furthest corner against the wall.
"My love, what happened?" Sanji asked you worriedly, coming closer. "Are you hurt?"
"No. Just scared," you told him, trembling slightly.
"Why are you scared? Is there something in your room?" But even as he asked that question, he scanned your room and couldn't find what might have gotten this reaction out of you.
"There's a spider on the wall behind you," you offered weakly.
Your boyfriend turned around to see what must have been the biggest spider he had ever encountered. Now he understood your reaction. He, too, trembled in fear at the sight. But he was your boyfriend, he needed to protect you.
"Sanjiiiiii!" You whined when he just stood there. "It's moving!"
"Have no fear my love, I will take care of it!"
And then he ran out of the room. Leaving you to cry, terrified by the fact that now your boyfriend had abandoned you. Stupid, huge spider.
Sanji came running back in moments later, however, holding a pan. You gape at him, wondering how that was supposed to help, before he threw it at the massive eight-legged creature. This only pissed it off, and it started moving. Sanji screamed, grabbed you and sprinted out of the room again.
"Sanji!"
"I have a plan b!"
His plan b was, in fact, Nami. She had to go in and remove the spider, and Sanji felt terrible. He failed you as a boyfriend.
"Thanks for at least trying," you laughed when you finally calmed down, kissing his cheek. "It was pretty brave of you, considering you're also afraid of them."
His eyes bugged out of his head, heart-shaped, "Anything for you, my love!"
LUFFY
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When Luffy heard you crying for his help he thought that you were being attacked. He rushed to help you, because you never cried for help like that unless you were truly terrified. And when he got to where you were, in the bathroom, he stopped dead when he saw you in the corner with your towel around your body, staring at something in the sink.
"(Name), what's wrong?" He asked you, confused. He didn't see an immediate threat.
"Look in the sink," you answered, voice shaky.
Your captain approached the sink, his eyes going wide when he spotted the spider, "Oooh, cool!"
"Luffy!" You cried. "Get it out of here!"
"But why?" He turned to look at you. "It can't hurt you."
"Luffy please!" You squealed, curling up into yourself and hiding your face. "You know I hate spiders!"
He pouted, not seeing the problem, but since you were so bothered by it he picked up the spider like it was nothing, and turned to you. You screamed and fainted on the spot, and Luffy panicked. He ran out and threw the spider overboard before running back to you.
"(Name)!" He picked you up and shook you, thinking that would wake you up.
You did wake up, but not when he shook you. He had taken you to Chopper, towel and all, and you screeched as you sat up and covered yourself, "Luffy!"
"(Name)!" He grinned, "You're awake!"
"You brought me here in my towel?!"
"I was worried!" He answered. "Besides, Chopper didn't look. He told me you just fainted and would wake up soon."
"You showed me a spider," you shivered. "Of course I fainted."
"I'm sorry," he apologised sincerely. "I won't do it again."
"You better not."
LAW
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You try to keep your terror to yourself, not wanting to bother or irritate Law. He was busy, so you figured you had to do this yourself. It was absolutely horrifying, sitting on the table and staring at the eight-legged creature you would eventually have to remove.
Bepo was your saving grace, or at least you thought so until he also got scared and quickly left the room. Fortunately, he ran into Law who was looking for you, and told the captain that a spider was holding you hostage.
"A...spider," Law repeated incredulously, then sighed and made his way to the room you were stuck in. "Where is it?"
You were too busy trying to throw your shoes at it that you hadn't noticed Law enter. He frowned when he saw your eyes glistening and your form trembling.
"(Name)-ya."
You finally looked up, sighing in relief when you saw him, "Please help me, Law."
You sounded so terrified, that your boyfriend found it difficult to be annoyed. You didn't have to be afraid, you shouldn't be, not when you have him around. So, worried that you might pass out from fear, he just room, shambled it into the ocean, a shell taking its place on the floor.
You finally breathed, relaxing as you got off the table, "Thank you, Law. I'm sorry for disturbing you."
He came over to you and, in a rare display of affection, hugged you and kissed the top of your head. He said nothing, but his actions comforted you and you slowly calmed down.
And in that moment you knew he would always be there to help you, regardless of what he was doing. That proved his love, better than words ever could.
KAKU
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Kaku returned home to find you were not in the kitchen like you usually were, ready to greet him with dinner and a kiss. In fact, dinner hadn't even been started, and this struck Kaku as extremely odd. Cautiously, he made his way upstairs only to hear things being thrown around and multiple crashes and thuds.
He burst into the room thinking you were under attack, only to see you running around room crying and tossing things over your shoulder. He couldn't see anything wrong, until he looked down and noticed a massive spider following you.
"Kaku!" You sobbed in relief when you spotted him. "Can you please get rid of this demon?"
He chuckled at your name for it, "Of course, sweetheart."
Your eyes almost bugged out of your head as he, with absolutely no hesitance, bent down and grabbed the spider by its legs. He stood up with it and you yelped and tumbled backwards onto your bed as he took the eight-legged creature outside.
"Is that better?" He smiled at you sweetly when he returned.
"Much," you smiled back, relaxing again, "Thank you, baby." You got up and walked over to him, kissing him sweetly. "Now let me go make you the biggest, best dinner you've ever had."
"I'll help," he offered, ever the sweetheart.
"No, no, no," you shook your head, taking his hand and leading him downstairs. "My hero gets to sit there and look handsome."
He chuckled again, his cheeks going pink at the praise.
USOPP
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This guy...is on the table with you. Seriously, when you screamed and he came running, he took one look at the floor before he jumped so high that he ended up with you on the table. He was shivering and shaking more than you were, and you gave him an 'are you kidding me' look.
"Hey! Those things are freaky!" He defended himself.
You rolled your eyes, "Okay, but now who's going to save us?"
"...I didn't think this through."
"No, you did not."
The two of you sat there for a while, wondering who you could call and who would actually come help if you did. Meanwhile, the spider stayed where it was, taunting you both.
"I mean I could...hit it with a flaming star?" He suggested.
"And risk burning the floor? And the ship?"
"Right..."
"Throw something else at it," you told him. "Ooh, throw your shoe."
"I'm not throwing my shoe! You throw yours!"
"You were the one who got us in this situation!"
"But you-"
Robin walked into the room at that moment, only to stop when she noticed the two of you cowering on the table. She looked at the spider, then at you two, and laughed.
"Do you guys need some help?"
"Yes please!" You both begged.
Robin used her devil fruit power to get the spider out, making a trail of arms that eventually led overboard.
"Thanks, Robin," you smiled, which she returned before leaving. You whirled on Usopp, about to ask what that was when you noticed how pale he had gone. "Come on, let's go get your mind off the spider."
You took his hand and led him away, shaking your head.
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windvexer · 23 hours ago
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I actually do think that doing magic takes a lot of work and is kinda hard and there aren't very many good shortcuts, and many modern shortcuts actually just amount to leaving out steps, which means you either have to be powerful enough to brute-force it or it fizzles.
Look, I know some people are just much better at magic and witchcraft; anything they do works with little effort, and the lengths some of us have to go to accomplish magic seems bizarre to them. Those people are cool and I wish I was like them but I'm not.
But I also think some of the truth of how to work effective sorcery gets paved over by these "witchcraft has no rules, do anything you want" support posts.
Because A) that is not true, I believe that witchcraft has lots and lots of rules (it's just that nobody else can tell you what they are), and B) I think do anything you want is taken to mean anything you do should work, which is also not true.
I feel like I always see advice given that you don't need to do things (like use physical tools, or cast circles, or whatever). But I never see anyone explaining the techniques and paths of power that are supposed to replace them.
Let's just imagine for a moment that clear quartz really is a universal substitute. Discordians would say that it totally is. So does that mean all you have to do to sub out clear quartz is to just put it on the altar and do the ritual as if it's something else?
Or do you have to do something more?
Do you have to consecrate the stone as being something other than what it is? Do you have to ritually birth it into a new life and baptize it like a baby? Do you have to spend weeks or months honing your technique of focus and beliefs so that you can mentally shift from consensus reality to a personal reality where there is literally no difference between clear quartz and sodalite?
Do you have to raise energies of sodalite and imprint them into the quartz crystal, perhaps working over it for an extended period of time? Do you have to use energy work to tie the clear quartz into Ideal Sodalite so that it becomes like an avatar?
No, you don't have to use physical tools if you don't want to. But that shouldn't be taken to imply that tools are useless or can be replaced in a way that matters by just visualizing that you have them.
A witch spends six months propitiating a tree, ingratiating themselves with the land, offerings and acts of fealty to the tree, a week-long branch harvesting ritual, blood offerings at midnight on a holy day, then another year curing the wood and crafting a wand. Big effort, right?
And you don't need to do that. But if you want that power, what are you going to do instead?
Same with circle-casting. Same with magic on the full moon. No, you don't have to wait until the full moon. You don't have to wait until the moon is in Libra. But there's a really good reason people do those things. So if you want those effects, what actions can replace those effects?
You literally could not do the spell while the full moon is in Libra. That's fine. But then what will bridge the gap? Will you have to raise more energy somewhere else? Include a new aspect? Modify the spell for the moon you can work with?
"You don't have to follow the moon phase for magic" doesn't mean the moon phase is irrelevant and some witches just like to inconvenience themselves for no reason. But it does mean that you can probably adapt your working to overcome the moon being in the inopportune phase.
Every time I talk about how much time, energy, and effort magic can be I feel like someone always replies, "well, it's just not that hard for me! I do what I want with what I have when I need it and it always just works, with very little effort."
Which I think is very great for them, but I also don't think that most people can get results with such low effort.
So anyway my entire point is that I think sometimes the reason people struggle with getting witchcraft to work is because they are operating off of out-of-context soundbites that make it sound like you can just completely cut out some of these foundational concepts of witchcraft.
Maybe you don't have to accomplish those steps in traditional ways. Maybe you don't need all of those steps for every spell you're doing.
But if you've just cut out swaths of steps only because you heard someone say you don't need them (not because of your own experiments working with magic and determining what works best for you), then is there enough left to constitute a functional system of magic?
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thedeskofaltoclef · 2 days ago
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How I became The Desk of Alto Clef.
My response to a SCP Group designed around Hate and Bigotry who have targeted me and others in this community.
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Nah, man, my daughter is dead.
It has been brought to my attention that there is a group of people on the internet who are fascinated with my fascination of Alto Clef and Meri. Hurtful and yet cute in a way so I think now I'll choose this time and these screen grabs from their discord to explain how I came to be 'The Desk of Alto Clef'.
My Daughter died six years ago and it sent me spiraling deep into the bottom of whatever bottle I could find.
I was completely prepared to take my own life and even had the things to 'finish the job' because my life had no meaning at that point. What was another statistic going to matter anyways, right?
It was in one of these dark, drunk moments with a gun when I fell across the Volgun's video on 'reality benders and you' and fell into a rabbit hole.
Drunkenly I fumbled around the wiki and learned more about this broken man known as Alto Clef.
A man whom I could relate to in my own way. A man who, no matter what he did, could never see his daughter as I will never be able to see mine. So thus, I became a very, very shitty cosplayer.
I like to believe that over the past four years my acting ability has increased to a sustainable level and as much as I joke about things I do try to stay humble about it. Though I like to think I've become better but I digress.
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I love the lore of Clef and Meri, on or offsite, to the point that I am weird about it I know, but that's how I stay connected to my daughter. Writing the Deskverse is how I stay connected to my daughter.
I am also autistic which causes me to hyper fixate on Clef as a coping mechanism.
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Because of this group of people I have greatly considered leaving the community and going back to my own personal solitude. Acting, Voice Acting, Cosplaying as Clef gave and still gives me something to live for again. I may not be this group's cup of tea but I do like to believe that I have helped others. My main goal has always been to uplift those who need uplifting. I do not want anyone to ever feel how I felt in my lowest and darkest moments.
The main story in the deskverse is about a father and a daughter torn apart by the actions of an abusive mother. My real life story.
I also have ZERO clue as to why I am being involved with misogyny or yuri things. If I have offended you in any way I do apologize.
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I do not plan on posting the more 'suggestive' or 'lewd' responses they have made. Overly sexualized content does make me extremely uncomfortable.
This group of people have broken my heart into pieces. Seeing this list of images and names dragging me through the mud has already smashed my unstable self-esteem as it is.
At this time I do not plan on releasing any names associated with all of this because I am honestly tired of reliving the most horrid event of my life over and over because I, for whatever reason, do not fit what this group feels is acceptable of an actor/writer/fan.
I cannot say the same for the others in which they were assaulting.
In summary Alto Clef is an outlet for the pain I live with every day. I can never see, hold, hear, smell, or speak to my daughter. I have scars on my body from her mother that will never allow me to forget that life I had. I will always remember the taste of gunpowder but thankfully my drunk ass was too weak. If your going to be bad at something, be bad at that I suppose.
I will leave all of this with a final image from the copious list and the one that honestly hurts me the most. I am honestly a shy and reserved person and frankly it takes a lot for me to get out of my comfort zone. Not long ago I went to another SCP discord server because I wanted to meet new people and someone in there was awesome. I truly enjoyed my time with this person and just found them amazing. They were kind, open, willing to listen to my ideas, and gushed over Numberonedoggo. I thought I had finally made a new friend on my own. I was apparently wrong.
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Art, from some of my favorite artists, was made for the sole reason of mocking me specifically. To laugh at me for finding joy in something that gives me purpose. Something I use to drive away the darkness.
No age, disorder, illness, or reason at all can be acceptable for anyone to act in this way. You are all a mockery of everything the SCP community should stand for.
-TheDesk
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sirhamburrger · 3 days ago
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havin' deep and uncomfortable conversations around the christmas tree (rin itoshi x gn!reader)
(a continuation of this more ryusae-centric drabble) being unexpectedly vulnerable with you wasn't really on rin itoshi's christmas wishlist. but he does want to ask you something else, and it would really make his christmas if you said yes. you will get a sentimental feelin' when you hear voices singin', "let's be jolly, deck the halls with boughs of holly" || wc: 861 || tags/cw: hurt/comfort, background ryusae, itoshi brother drama (but they're working on it), rin is bad at telling people how he feels (he's working on that too) series m.list
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you watch the video ryusei just sent you. it’s... of him slapping sae’s ass really hard, but after months of being stuck with them as your roommates, your humor is broken. you whip your head around, giggling, ready to show it to rin, but your smile fades when you see the crease between his eyebrows. that only happens when he realises he's forgotten to buy groceries, or…
or when sae texts him.
you set down the box of baubles tucked under your arm and take his hands in yours, brushing his hair out of his eyes so you can look at him properly. even so, he doesn't look you in the eye.
“everything okay?” you ask softly.
he blinks. you feel his hands clench into fists within yours. 
“yeah. everything's fine.”
“what did he say?”
"he wants to have lunch with me tomorrow.”
you furrow your brows slightly. “well, then you should go. i know we have plans, but we could always go another day.”
he nods, but he's got his brooding face on, still. there's something he's not telling you, and you're determined to get it out of him on this not-very-eventful saturday afternoon.
so you flop onto the ground by the christmas tree - the christmas tree the two of you are in the midst of decorating. wiggling your way into the shade of the lower leaves, you tug on his pant leg.
“well? join me!”
looking slightly bemused, he lays down on the floor and positions himself opposite you. admiring his beautiful eyelashes up close, you twirl a lock of his hair around your finger. he smiles at this, his breath fanning over your face.
you ask him point-blank, then, when he might least expect it.
“what are you afraid of?”
“nothing.”
“liar.”
you stare at him as seriously as you can, and he stares back with double the intensity. you’re locked in, you could say - it’s a shared tradition of yours that whenever you have a staring contest, winner takes all. the last cookie. choice of date location. or something you want to know.
seconds creep by. thirty. forty-five. a minute. a minute and fifteen. tears start to pool in your dehydrated eyes.
rin's gaze softens some.
"are we about to kiss?" you mutter weakly.
"give up, darling," he advises gently.
a tear runs down your cheek. "no."
he makes a tsking noise at your stubbornness, and slowly - very, very slowly - he closes his eyes.
"i'm scared that sae is going to treat me differently now that we're both grown up and he knows we can't ever go back to what we were before."
you blink.
damn, that's...
he opens his eyes. "happy?"
it’s like a punch to the gut when he says it like that.
"of course not," you mumble. "i'm sorry. i shouldn't have pressured you to say anything at all."
rin sighs heavily. "i think a part of me kind of wanted to tell you anyway, so."
"do you want to tell me more?"
he nods.
"when we were kids, it was all so easy. i looked up to him - i still do. we were together 24/7. we did everything together. and then he left for spain. came back a changed person. and okay, i get that he wants to reconcile and all, but it's just weird. he's really trying his best, and i am too. but we'll never be how we were in the past. it's too late for that."
"oh, honey..."
you want to reach over and hug him until he can't breathe, but then you remember you're lying on the floor. you scoot over to lie by his side.
"the important thing is that you're both trying really hard. you're talking to him more often, meeting him for meals - and sae really does want to make things right. i literally live with the man! he lets ryusei check his spelling in the texts he sends you."
"really?"
"yes, really. so you don't have to be worried. not at all."
“okay.”
you see the crease between his eyebrows has disappeared, and peck him on the nose. his lips twitch, and you see him open his mouth –
“move in with me.”
what?
“i want you in my life,” rin murmurs, abrupt, blunt, but that's how he does things, after all. “because i love you, and i want to be with you all the time.”
you're temporarily frozen in place, utterly surprised. but that quickly gives way to a rush of affection for your boyfriend, and you pepper his face with little kisses as he chuckles.
“i'll take that as a yes, then,” he says dryly, and you give him another kiss for his troubles.
you think of sae and ryusei, and pout. “i'm going to miss having them as roommates, though.”
“but would they make you breakfast pancakes every day?”
you pretend to collapse in his arms. “i’m going to wife you up one day, itoshi.”
he reaches for the switch on the christmas lights strung along the tree branches, and you look up, and your vision is filled with sparks of colour.
and in your little world, all is perfect.
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this is what's happening btw (it probably wasn't very clear)
a/n: i never thought i would write for rin because for some weird reason i didn't like him when i watched his anime debut but like?? is he not so much like todoroki? (if todoroki was more edgy ig) but yeah i was prepared to write him as a sweetheart in this one
taglist: @anglefish3008, @standcom (open, leave a comment on any post in this series to be added!)
bllk masterlist || general masterlist
© sirhamburrger 2024
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808airsoftbros · 2 days ago
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Christmas Wish (Female Idols)
Author: Merry Christmas everyone, here is my special holidays oneshot. I may or may not write a New Year's special sequel as I did plan to write a smut into this but I didn't have the time and energy spent on the Holiday mayhem. Anyway, hope you enjoy and if you want to check out more stories go to Masterlist.
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Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright Round yon Virgin, Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace
Silent night, holy night Shepherds quake at the sight Glories stream from heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia Christ the Savior is born Christ the Savior is born
Silent night, holy night Son of God, love's pure light Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace Jesus Lord, at Thy birth Jesus Lord, at Thy birth
Y/N's POV
It was another night of singing Christmas carols in my local church theatre, just like every year on the holidays. Despite the years that had passed, everyone showed up in droves, and family and friends came together.
Some are apart for most of the year for study or work, and seeing them come together again as a union once more makes me envy them.
My whole life I grew up as an orphan, I don't even know what my family looks like or what it's even like to have one. I was unwanted, cast aside, and not even worth a penny in this society.
Then why do I sing these stupid Christmas carols? I don't even know myself... Maybe because it's all I know because there's nowhere to go? Perhaps.
But the real reason doesn't matter much now, does it? No, not really. I don't even know the meaning of life, and I have no idea of my purpose.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I thank you all for taking the time to come to this wonderful Christmas chorale this evening! It was such a pleasure to always host this yearly tradition in this glamorous town! And it's such a wonderful feeling seeing all of you reunited with family and friends you may not have seen in years, now, please give a warm applause to our singers!" The host spoke to the crowd and they all cheered as they clapped the sounds echoing in the church.
As we all dispersed from our group, I didn't even bother staying for the after-party as nobody cared about me and wouldn't notice I was gone. I knew I was simply a meaningless character in the background of everyone's story.
Once I walked inside the comfort of my apartment I sighed as I closed the door, I sat down on the couch cracking open a bottle of apple soju from the fridge just dazing in my thoughts.
"Silent night~. Holy night~. Yeah, shut the fuck up..." I said to myself as that stupid chorale was stuck playing in my head as if the Universe was mocking me.
Why does my life fucking suck? I don't know and I don't even care at this point... Because what's the point in life anymore?
Everyone has a purpose in life, whether to be working, being a celebrity for everyone to admire and fan over, or whatever that may be. But here I am slouching in my apartment like a waste of space in this world.
What is my damn purpose here? To be a pathetic joke and stain on society? Wow, what a way to start my life and this will likely stay that way forever.
Looking at the clock, I sighed deeply as it was nearly time for me to go to work, I slipped on my shopkeeper's uniform before heading into the store to relieve my co-worker who was wrapping up his shift for the day.
"Ah, Merry Christmas, Y/N, right on time as usual," He greeted and I nodded.
"Busy today?" I asked and he nodded.
"Yup, the store's been packed with tourists all day, but tonight should be slow since nobody is out at night so it should be a pretty slow and chill shift for you," He sighed as he grabbed his things.
I watched as my co-worker walked out of the store and into the winter snow as the sun was slowly starting to set down and darkness slowly began taking over the city.
Settling down on the stand, I placed in headphones listening to chill music to pass the time as I stared at the empty store, even though this was going to be boring as hell it was free money for me and I pretty much had the run of the store.
I did ring out a few late-night customers that I see every night buying beer and smokes along with snacks but other than that the streets are empty.
"That would be all tonight for you miss?" I asked politely and the customer nodded.
"Yes please," She replied as I rang up her items.
Just as I was about to finish up the transaction I heard the doorbell ringing, glancing to see who was entering, it was a woman wearing a black mask and a black winter coat wearing high heels with black stockings.
This made me raise an eyebrow as I had never seen the woman around here before, I thanked the lady for shopping there as I handed her the bag of her stuff, and I silently watched the strange woman as the lady walked out of the store.
I sighed leaning back on the chair as I quietly watched the woman browse the snack and beer section with a hint of curiosity but I kept it subtle so as not to create an awkward situation.
About maybe five minutes later, she grabbed some snacks along with the most expensive wine available which is a bit surprising as nobody has ever purchased it as long as I worked here.
"Hello, miss, will this be all tonight?" I asked in that same professional and polite tone.
The lady didn't reply but just nodded and I shrugged as I assumed she wasn't a talker, I ringed up her snacks but when I rang up the wine the POS locked me out requiring me to enter a date of birth.
"Can I see your ID real quick?" I asked politely and she seemed hesitant.
"Sorry miss, but if you don't show me your ID, I cannot sell you this," I informed her and she sighed as she pulled out her wallet before showing me her ID card.
Reading the date of birth the expiration date along with the authenticity, everything seemed to check out as she was above the age of 18 but the issue was her face as she was wearing the mask.
"Again, I'm sorry, but could pull down your mask? I need to see if the picture on your ID matches yours," I instructed and she seemed a bit irritated.
"Come on, I'm over 18, and I got places to be," She complained and I sighed as it seemed she was another difficult customer.
"I deeply apologize ma'am, but this is the law we're talking about here and I unfortunately don't make the rules here. Either show your face or you'll have to leave the wine behind," I explained to her and she huffed still refusing.
Just as I was about to take the wine off, I heard the doorbell ringing and another lavish woman walked in looking confused.
"Yah, Chewie, what's taking so long?" She asked her.
"Well, this idiot here thinks my ID isn't mine," The woman nicknamed Chewie answered and she sighed.
"Probably because we're wearing masks. Just do it, Chewie, before we're late, and besides, nobody else is here at this hour," the strange lady pointed out, and Chewie rolled her eyes.
Reluctantly, the woman pulled down her mask and picture on the ID, and her face checked out, allowing the transaction to finish up and me to not have to put up with her rich, snotty attitude.
"I'm sorry about that, sir. She doesn't get along with strangers well," the lady apologized on her behalf.
"No worries, it's part of the job," I assured and the lady sighed in relief seeing I wasn't too angry about the petty issue.
As they grabbed the bag of items, I watched them leave making me sigh in relief as I could get back to my other duties. I have dealt with many stupid customers in the past but this was a first, having some rich snot thinking they're above everyone else and the law.
I shrugged it off as I went to cook up some fresh hot dogs for the hot food stock along with pretzels stuffing the pre-made dough in the oven.
After I finished restocking the store, I wiped down the counter when I heard the doorbell ringing again and I looked up to see a couple of women wearing the same masks as the previous two did but their clothing was more casual this time instead of the lavish designer clothes.
Naturally, I kept my guard up and ready for their nonsensical rich crap as I wiped down the counter until the two women walked up to me holding a couple of cases of soju.
"Good evening, ladies, will this be all today?" I asked politely.
"Yup, that will be all, do you need to see our IDs?" One of them asked and I was a bit surprised.
"Uhm, yes, please," I answered they showed their IDs without a fuss and pulled down masks proving the pictures matched.
"Aight, your ladies check out," I informed them.
"By any chance, did our little friend Chewie give you any trouble tonight?" Haseul asked kindly and I raised an eyebrow.
"Who again?" I asked a bit confused.
"You know, the tall Taiwanese woman that just walked in here," Heejin chimed in and I chuckled.
"Eh, somewhat, nagging about pulling down her mask," I answered but also kept it professional and they giggled.
"Yeah, she's like that, that's why we don't often take her out much because she always causes trouble and we can't have news reporting scandals about her, can we?" Haseul mentioned as she inserted her credit card into the pin pad.
"What do you mean?" I asked and they seemed surprised by my question.
Haseul and Heejin looked at each other for a moment, somehow assuming that I might've heard about them like they were some sort of celebrities. Or perhaps they are and I live under a rock.
"N-Nevermind, how much do I owe?" Haseul asked giving a nervous smile and I told her the amount due.
Once the transaction was complete I handed over the receipt and they left without saying another word. I grabbed the cleaning cloth when I noticed Haseul had left her phone on my counter.
I grabbed the phone and rushed out of the store but by the time I got out, I watched them start their car and drive away and I sighed as I went back into the store seeing no point in chasing after them.
Getting back behind the counter trying to figure out what to do next, after thinking for some time I got an idea, I grabbed a paperclip in the drawer and bent it out to make a needle.
I take the phone out of its case carefully making sure I don't damage or scratch anything, I find the hole on the side and insert the needle popping out the SIM card slot.
"Bingo," I muttered holding the SIM card.
Seeing there were no customers around and the store was neat and tightly for now, I had plenty of spare time to kill as I took out my laptop plugged the SIM card into the slot, and used software to decode the information and find her phone number.
When I finished getting the necessary information, I managed to write down her number before sending her a text informing her that she had left her phone at my store.
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I placed my phone down feeling rather odd at how she easily trusted me despite being a stranger to her, I guess she must be that busy and desperate to trust me that much.
Welp, there's nothing much more I can do about it unfortunately and I can only wait until my shift is over so I can turn her phone over.
Looking up the address on Google, it luckily wasn't too far away and within walking distance, but it's also impressive that they are located in the most expensive hotel in the city which shouldn't be all that surprising.
When I finally finished my shift, I made my way to the hotel but as I was walking I just wondered why Haseul didn't ask how I got her number in the first place. Strange now I think about it...
Whatever, the least I can do now is return her phone and get out of their hair for good, and it's not like they'll drag me into their hotel room and make me their pet, right? Some sort of delusional Christmas wish.
Anyway, I finally made my way through the hotel lobby after getting the number of their room, I hopped onto the elevator to the top floor, making my way through the corridor filled with pots of plants and statues.
Walking past the various rooms, I managed to find the right one, I took a breath before hitting the doorbell button.
"Who could that be?!" I heard a female voice ask loudly.
"I hope it's not a saesang! Let me check!"
Hearing footsteps coming upon the door, assuming the person was looking through the peephole, the door opened soon after.
"Can I help you?" A squirrel-looking Japanese woman asked and I held up Haseul's phone.
"I came to return Haseul's phone, I believe this belongs to her," I informed her handing over the phone to her.
"Oh, why thank you but how did you find it?" The woman asked cautiously.
"Haseul texted me to come here, I used the SIM card to track her number... I hope that doesn't sound too creepy, I didn't know what else to do," I explained nervously hoping that they don't call the cops on me.
The woman looked at me checking me out and making sure I wasn't some creepy stalker or hacker coming to steal her information or something.
Soon after, she called Haseul over and she came over soon after sighing in relief that I arrived before handing back her phone.
"Oh, thank you so much! You're a real lifesaver!" Haseul thanked me profusely.
"Yeah, it's no problem, Noona, Merry Christmas," I replied and was about to walk away.
"Hold it!"
I froze in place, slowly turning around to see what they wanted, my stomach hung in balance as I could only imagine the worst about to come.
"You really thought we'd let you leave without thanking you properly~?" Haseul asked with a warm smile and I raised an eyebrow.
"Uhh... What?" I asked.
"What she's saying is that we want you to stay for the party, if you're free of course," Nayeon chimed in and my eyes widened.
Well, I'll fucking be...
"Uh... yeah, I am," I confessed nervously and Nayeon came forward taking my arm and dragging me into their room almost seeming the ridiculous Christmas wish was coming true after all... At least most of it.
As Nayeon got me inside the room, the squirrel woman closed the door behind us, I was taken into the living room where I was astonished to see it was all girls.
"Oh, Haseul, is that Y/N? The one you kept talking about?" A Thomas-looking woman asked and Haseul nodded.
"Well, he is cute,"
"Is he staying for the party?"
"Ugh, why is he here?"
"Yah! Chewie, be nice to our guest for once!"
"Hmph!"
As the Japanese woman introduced herself, Sana seated me on the couch next to her, keeping her arm locked around mine. The girls just chuckled amusingly, seeing how clingy she was around me.
"Yah, miss flirt, you might give the guy a nosebleed if you keep holding him like that?" Jeongyeon pointed out at Sana pressing her boobs on my arm and she giggled only putting more pressure.
"So what if I do? I do enjoy pampering... Especially young men," She replied with a sultry tone as she caressed my chest making me gulp.
"Oh, God, Unnie, you always are a creep. You know that?" Tzuyu rolled her eyes, but Sana took no notice.
"Don't worry about them sweetheart, I have a surprise Christmas present waiting in the bedroom... If you know what I mean~," She giggled in a flirty way and I swore I felt my nose was about to bleed any second.
Soon after, the sassy idol Chaewon approached me, wrapping an arm around mine and forcing me away from her, but Sana brought me back.
"Yah! I saw him first!" Sana bickered.
"No! I won't let you corrupt him! Especially on the Holidays!" Chaewon replied as she continued tugging at me.
"Yah! Girls enough already!" JiU butted in breaking them and sighing in relief as I felt I was gonna get split into two.
"Look, girls, like Chaewon said, it's the Holiday season, and Christmas is around the corner. How about we all just enjoy each other's company while it lasts? We've all had a busy year, and we certainly don't need to add more problems right now, so how about we move on and enjoy ourselves?" Jihyo proposed, and the girls agreed.
"Does that mean I go home?" I asked raising my hand and the girls all shook their heads.
"No!" They all said in unison and I sighed.
When the party was done being set up for tonight, the girls went out shopping, of course, I was dragged along against my will with Gaeul, Handong, Sana, and Chaewon.
We all split into multiple groups, and I stayed with the four girls, who kept me in place and took me around the massive mall full of toy shops, gaming surplus, and much more as the girls shopped for clothes.
"First off, my dear, let's upgrade that Dinosaur of a phone," Handong pointed out.
"But it's the iPhone 4..." I mentioned and Gaeul facepalmed making me confused as this is the latest phone... At least that's what I thought.
"Pabo! Were you living under a rock? Come, let us show you the magic of modern technology," Chaewon said, taking my hand and leading me into the Apple store.
Looking around, I marveled at the accessories for Airpods, Beats, and iPads, and I was surprised to see the new iPhone lineup. I was living under a rock, being so busy with work and staying at my apartment most of the time.
One of the staff members approached, asking if they needed assistance. The girls asked the guy for the most expensive iPhone they had, and he took us over to the iPhone 16 Pro Max, which made my jaw drop as it was a whopping $1,599, the initial price for 1 TB.
Of course, being idols this was nothing to them as they paid for the new phone and soon set me up with the new model.
"Jeez, I know I returned your phone but this is quite a bit much," I commented checking out my new phone.
"No worries, dear, this will not even be close to denting our bank accounts compared to the rest of the shopping trip," Sana giggled.
"So best prepare yourself to be spoiled all day," Chaewon said, and I sighed as I was dragged along with them.
The entire day was spent just the girls buying shit for me like luxury brands like Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and even Lego sets that I've wanted. All of this would've made me broke but I guarantee none of these expenses wasn't even close to making dents to their accounts.
"Come on, Y/N, we still got more shops to look at! I gotta get Christmas gifts for my family!" Chaewon said in a demanding tone as she held my hand.
"Oh, yeah, that reminds me I need to find something for my siblings," Sana remembered as she looked around the stores.
"Same, I gotta find gifts for my parents," Handong mentioned.
"I also have to find a gift for my Oppa and parents," Gaeul chimed as she looked around the stores to see if there were gifts they might like.
Following the girls around various stores, it felt like forever as the girls searched the clothing stores and jewelry shops until they finally settled on the perfect presents.
"Ah, this is perfect! My Eomma is gonna love this!" Sana said in a satisfied manner as she inspected the custom butterfly necklace that was laced with diamonds.
"Wow, that is so pretty, Unnie!" Gaeul agreed.
Wrapping up the Christmas mall shopping, we all reunited holding multiple shopping bags but I saw Jihyo holding the most compared to me.
"You gonna lend a girl a hand~?" Jihyo playfully asked and I looked down seeing my hands were full as it is.
"Kidding, Y/N, I see you're hands look like they're about to fall off and I've handled more bags than this, especially when the girls go out shopping in many places around the world," Jihyo chuckled.
We walked to the two vans we took to drive here placing all the bags into the trunks before I joined Gaeul and the three girls in one of the vans.
"You look tired, my dear, you can lay your head on my shoulder or lap if you want~," Sana offered wrapping an arm around my waist.
"Yah! No, listen to that old hag! My body is more comfy!" Gaeul rebutted and they bickered making me groan as I leaned against the headrest enduring the noisy girls the entire ride.
Once we finally made it back to the hotel, we carried the shopping bags inside the room making sigh in relief as the bags were heavy as hell.
The girls were starving, of course, JiU, Haseul, and Jihyo agreed to order room service making lots of orders as the girls wrote down what they wanted.
"So what do you want, my dear, Y/N~?" Heejin asked handing over the paper and pen.
"Uhm, not sure if I want... Hehe," I politely declined and she pouted.
"Oh, come on, Y/N, it's on us and we did promise to spoil you~," Heejin insisted and I sighed as I couldn't resist that adorable pout.
Writing down what I wanted the girls chimed in money to pay for the food before making the order on the phone, Choerry and Liz sat next to me hugging me from both sides.
"So how do you think of the party so far~?" Choerry playfully asked.
"It's something... Though I never expected to be here for simply returning a phone," I nervously answered and they giggled.
"I know, kinda reminds you of one of those Wattpad fanfictions, huh?" Liz asked and I found it funny now I think about it.
"And would you know that, Liz?" Leeseo asked raising an eyebrow and Liz blushed almost sheepishly admitting she had been reading fan fiction.
"Oh, no worries, Liz! I think we all have read some of them at one point, I do find them interesting and some are quite ho-" SuA was about to say but Yves quickly covered her mouth.
"Hey! We have babies here!" Yves shushed her as she pointed at Leeseo and Eunchae.
"But I'm an adult now, right~?" Eunchae teasingly mentioned.
"Doesn't matter! You are still a baby!" Yves refuted and Eunchae pouted.
Just as I thought Liz and Choerry were enough, I found Yeojin sitting on my lap and curling up to me. She hugged me and nuzzled her face into my neck, which I found oddly cute.
"Yah! Yeojin! I want a turn!" Eunchae demanded but Yeojin stuck out her tongue in a mockery manner making the girls roll their eyes playfully watching the Maknaes fighting over my attention.
Well, my friends, I guess the lesson here is that you should expect the unexpected, especially during the Holiday season. Here I am, a background character being the main protagonist in this new world.
What do I expect next? I don't know, but I do know that I am not going anywhere with them all over me. Merry Christmas.
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iatrophilosophos · 1 day ago
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Hey I'm hearing uh. More, and more, and more buzz about GLP-1 agonists like ozempic from random ppl and healthcare providers alike and there's like a terrifying lack of lucidity abt it so I just wanna say, if you've heard some stuff and are curious:
Ozempic is a chemically-aided crash diet. That's it.
Like metformin, an older diabetes medication used off-label for weight loss, it's functioning as an appetite suppressant in this use-case. It's not magic; it's not changing how your body makes or uses fat; it just makes it less miserable to eat less. It is contraindicated by histories of disordered eating and should absolutely not be prescribed without a full screening for above-adequate food intake and nutrition *and* ongoing screening for adequate nourishment/malnutrition: this is broadly not happening.
I've also seen no indication that ozempic/GLP-1 agonists are any less likely to lead to weight cycling (w/o constant use) than a straight crash diet, or do anything meaningful to limit the known, significant health risks of weight cycling.
Nothing has changed:
The main things we know from a western scientific perspective about weight and weight loss are that 1) almost all people who lose significant weight gain it back and 2) weight cycling causes cardiovascular and metabolic health complications. Yall we aint even have strong evidence to suggest that weight loss is beneficial to health conditions associated with higher weights. This *should* point to Dr's never ever reccomending weight loss (we do know it can hurt, don't know it can help) but yknow we live in uhhhh fucking world.
We are possibly ripe for an aggressive intensification of anti-fat medical rhetoric, especially in pediatrics
Among the projections for an RFK FDA that ive gotten from folks i know in these fields is a renewed focus on childhood obseity and general military-style fitness. As the ozempic fad has already been ramping up, I'm kinda! concerned! about this being a major point of focus for the oncoming administration--i figure we're ripe for another mass diet craze associated with a wide variety of deaths anyway and that existing cultural+market inertia added to it being literally on the agenda spells some not great things. I really seriously reccomend paying extra attention to this area.
Clinics love ozempic because it's extremely popular and extremely profitable--i even know someone who's job was threatened for refusing to prescribe it. We already know that we cant trust doctors to be informed around weight or for the system to sound public alarms.
Obviously, people have the right to do whatever they want--but the disclosure just isn't there and people are being sold this stuff based on the idea it'll make them *healthier* and prevent disease. It can't and it won't.
If the claims here about weight in general are new to you, start here: (Don't love the title of the article, second the exasperation)
If you want to understand more about glp-1 agonists specifically, like, start with the Wikipedia article and do some googling it lays out the pharmacology in relatively plain language. Sry i ain't doing a buncha work to find citations ppl won't click; there's not a lot of good critical stuff out there that's actually published but it doesn't actually take a lot of reading up on critical weight science to form a critical take on the sources singing ozempics praises.
Peace, good luck, do whatever you want forever, maybe tell ur mom that this isn't any different from the disastrous weight loss fads of the 90s.
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spdrvyn · 3 days ago
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YOU'RE HERE, THAT'S THE THING — [ wc: 1.7k. college au. fluff-ish? ] nothing cute about uni life. nothing to romanticize about pulling off all-nighters. unless... ?
now that i think about this is the first miguel fic i've written that's not adjacent with spiderverse canon world-building wise 🤔 also kinda silly of me to write a college fic when i'm not even in college so be warned i'll sound probably like a dumbass but hope you guys enjoy anyway!
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7:23PM in the evening. Twenty hours until your essay was due.
The blonded hues of the setting sun reflected onto your laptop’s screen, currently open with a completely blank Google Document and nary a draft or outline in sight. As the ice in your half-empty coffee had almost thoroughly melted, you realized that you were completely fucked.
Originally, there was a study group that you were intended on joining somewhere at the start of the week. Hell, you guys shared Notion calendars and made an entire group chat. Only when you courageously sent a message last night asking for a rain check on the plans, you were left on read and down one-hundred dignity points.
That’s how you ended up here, waiting for the adrenaline from the impending deadline to set in. The condensation from your drink wets your palm uncomfortably as you take a sad, bitter sip. Someone could be writing a story about your defeat, writing a ten-page analysis about it, and submitting it at least three days before the deadline like a normal person with a sense of urgency.
When you shut your laptop and concede to the pressure, Miguel walks in to your shared dorm. With thick textbooks and an open backpack slung over one of his shoulders, he pauses at the sight of you. “I thought you’d be out.”
The reminder that your group abandoned you sours your mood even more, you tersely reply: “They ghosted me.”
“Oh,” Miguel tries to sound sympathetic, but it’s obvious that he’s also struggling with a final of some kind with how he ushers all of his belongings to the table you’re currently occupying. He’s told you before that he rarely ever joins study groups, which makes sense. You’ve noticed he’s self-reliant and efficient to an almost terrifying degree when it comes to his academics, awake at ungodly hours of the night to pinch the highest grade that there is. If anything, it’s more likely that he’ll offer to tutor other people.
“What’s on your roster for tonight? I’ve got an essay,” You swiftly put on your document tab again, motivated by how he’s already flipping through his books and copying down notes on his tablet. God, you wished you could just start studying like that.
“Final tomorrow, haven’t started reviewing yet. I basically spent the last two days at the lab for my other final.” He’s writing at a speed that should be considered superhuman, all while he’s answering your pesky questions.
You don’t want to move to another spot, because it would seem rude. Not like his presence is unwelcome, his studiousness just makes you really, really envious. Also the fact that both of you are majoring in completely different subjects.
Majoring in Arts in Literature, while he majors in Genetic Engineering can cause difficulty whenever explaining plans to each other. Miguel puts in the effort to not confuse you with the STEM jargon while you try not to ramble about your current readings and explaining your interpretations of them to someone else instead of writing them down on paper to, you know, submit.
Either way, it hasn’t caused any big miscommunications with being so different and all. You hope he doesn’t mind you beginning to working with him too, as you shyly type a thesis statement into your assignment. Another sip of your coffee, sounds of Miguel scrawling, and you think you may be ready to take this assignment head-on.
~
12:40AM into the night. Fifteen hours until your essay is due.
Shockingly enough, you were able to finish three pages out of five. The grammar so far is probably going to drag you down by fifteen points and you usually send it to your friends to proofread, but it clearly isn’t an option given what time of the day it is right now. It’s still a lot better than the end you saw for yourself when you were left dangling on the edge of failure by your study group.
The caffeine had completely worn off by now, and your coffee had been drained somewhere around an hour ago. When that happens, you usually start to get antsy and it’s even harder to keep the momentum going and when that happens, you take a break and go for a walk or something.
Which is what you’re about to do, as you stand up, but you realize that Miguel is sitting still as a statue in front of one of his books and his eyes scan the words on the page, over and over again. You can’t tell if he’s also losing focus or if he’s knee-deep in focus.
“Miguel,” He sighs when you call his name and the noise makes you wince, fearing that you’ve upset him. “Uhm, I’m going to take a walk. Do you wanna come with?”
It’s an offer that you thought for sure he wasn’t going to take.
What you don’t expect however is for him to slam his reading shut, adjusting the glasses on the bridge of his nose before getting up from his seat. With a huff of, “Sure.”
“Oh- we can go for a coffee run if that’s what you want. I don’t think I can sleep tonight.”
“Ok. Me neither.”
“Great, that’s- that’s great.”
~
Both of you stew in the (semi) comfortable silence as you make the trek from your dorm room and out to the expanse of the campus.
You realize how brisk a walk can become with Miguel considering how abnormally tall he is. Granted, you recognize his subtle effort to slow down for you when he notices how winded you got after only five minutes on the way to the gas station.
It’s a new height that you’ve reached with him, not like you never wanted to grow closer with him or anything. He is your roommate after all, so it only makes sense. Although despite your love for reading that has fender-bendered into a Literature degree in the making, you were never too great at reading people. Miguel is one of the hardest people to read considering his outward stoicism, and both of you being naturally introverted didn’t help at all.
Still, this was the perfect time in your life to make new friends and life-lasting connections. Besides you would also consider yourself pretty pathetic if you wouldn’t be able to make a new one out of your roommate, A.K.A someone who is confined to a room with you for a whole school year. Literally no other choice but to do so.
You wonder if he feels the same way too, but asking each other of your first impressions is a conversation that is really only befitting for people that have been together for years. A status that you have no idea that you’ll ever achieve with him someday.
Though you are quickly broken out of your kind of depressing spiral when Miguel opens the door to the store for you, with a muttered ‘thank you’ you behold the fluorescent lights and hint of smoke. The walk to the coffee machine is instinctive, and you pluck a bag of spicy chips from the shelf on the way. Miguel follows suit, only he picks a bag of pretzels and a pack of gum.
The dispenser chokes out a splatter of coffee into your plastic cup and you flinch at the noise, Miguel spares you a glance but goes back to fidgeting with the pointed edges of his pretzel bag.
“So, what’s your final about?” It’s a stupid question being completely transparent, but fuck it. You’re bored, and the silence only gets more uncomfortable the longer both of you keep quiet.
“Genetic inheritance, the traits passed down from a parent onto a child. That kind of thing,” He muses. “And you?”
“Oh, Les Miserables essay. Five pages total.”
“Long book, and long film.”
Your cup is nearly on the tip of overflowing so you quickly slide it out and put one under for Miguel. “Yeah, I had to do a re-read because it’s been a while. I only finished around two days ago and I started it again at the beginning of the month.”
He gives you an honest chuckle, you take it and you think you’ll remember the sound forever. “One of my, uh, friends sat me down to watch the movie. Fell asleep halfway through, but I do remember it being decent in the parts that I was awake.”
“Well if I can find a totally legal recording of the stage play, maybe that would pique your interest more.”
When you look up at him, he smiles and it might be the happiest you’ve seen him ever since becoming acquainted with each other. It’s not a lot, but you feel over the moon over a small talk about your stupid essay.
…Your stupid essay!
You cut the moment short by haphazardly closing the lids on both of your coffees, you hand it to Miguel who starts to emanate your hurried energy and the walk back to your dorm is very swift.
~
Morning. Some time before your essay is due.
That is what you can assume anyway, the sun is back and its rays peek at you from the gaps in the blinds. Your hair is a frazzled mess as you lift your head off of the pillow which is perched up against the armrest on the sofa, the blanket on top of you shifts, and this was also… definitely not where you fell asleep last night.
You were expecting neck and back pain, along with a mild headache once you woke up. As you came to the sloppy completion of your work, you called it a night, slammed your laptop shut, and decided to just sleep right then and there. Doing your night routine and getting into bed would simply be too much time and work when you probably wouldn’t even be getting that much rest anyway.
There’s a fresh glass of water on the coffee table and a sticky note from Miguel, who you could only assume was the one who put you here.
‘Had to head out early for my exam. Good luck with your essay, there’s food on the counter.’
You slump back into your makeshift bed and pull out your phone from your back pocket, there’s still seven hours until your essay is due and you only need around two for revisions.
Maybe you could sleep in just a little longer, dream about conversations that will never happen, cafe dates that never come to be. But after last night, rather earlier this morning, those odds shift in your favor.
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godzillabreath · 2 days ago
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unfortunately I do have more to say about wwdits.
I think one of the most egregious things about the development of the show over the seasons is the tonal shift. I was watching it from the beginning to convince myself I wasn’t crazy for feeling the first three seasons were better, and I felt vindicated.
It was always a dark comedy, but it wasn’t always a zany dark comedy. It had been grounded in real, everyday life. The vampires prey on a LARP group, the vampires ride a late night bus to go to a city council meeting, Nandor tries for citizenship, etc. I think once they started introducing a slew of supernatural creatures like a monster-of-the-week a la carte, the show became increasingly less focused and outlandish. There are episode I don’t like even in seasons 2 and 3 that are emblematic of this shift. The siren, the gargoyles, the troll—they just feel out of place in a story that is supposed to focus on out-of-time vampires and how they engage with the modern world. They aren’t really adding anything to the characters or the plot when they appear either. They just make a flashy CGI appearance and give some quippy line, which ultimately eats up time where our main cast that we actually care about could otherwise be on screen, doing things. And then there was a point in time where this show just did not allow itself any more sentimental moments between characters. These moments, for me, made for refreshing moments between comedic situations. It balanced the humanity in all of the main cast. But the show opted out of those moments, and it just became a back-to-back comedic situation with less and less interesting character moments to look forward to. Anyway, I just find it kind of sad that the writers completely detonated all of the characters’ inner emotional lives by the series finale. I liked to see Nadja bored in her marriage and pursuing this lustful encounter with Gregor through reincarnated generations. I liked to see Colin challenged by another energy vampire undermining his territory. I liked to see Guillermo struggling with his fractured relationship with his family, his discomfort in his own sexual identity, and his need to cling on to this group of vampires that disrespect him if only to find family and personal liberation in their company. I liked Nandor being so disconnected from modernity that he became listless and depressed and lonely and clung on to the idea that he might make himself human again. I liked the romance that the writers were building literally textually and in all of their marketing material from season 3: that Guillermo (at least) had these unrequited and very frustrating feelings for Nandor and how that affected their relationship with each other. I liked the idea of Laszlo forming these personal connections with both Sean and Colin, even if I found their conclusive arcs to be lackluster, strange, or unpalatable (baby Colin to weird co-parent Colin was a bizarre arc.) I liked the idea of Nadja wanting power and community because of the impoverished, desolate conditions she grew up under (especially the class dynamic of marrying Laszlo and how that could be at times a schism in their relationship), even if the writers did not care to expand upon this. The potential just drives me crazy. I can’t believe they opted out of tying up any of these emotional hooks. I think it might drive me crazy forever.
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sonderblade · 2 days ago
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SONIC MOVIE 3 SPOILERS AHEAD!
SCROLL NOW YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!
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Okay so we all know that Shadows survives at the end but I was thinking about if they went down the path of Shadow feeling extremely guilty for almost destroying the world and doing the opposite of what Maria wanted but I also was thinking about Shadow having strong guilt towards SONIC considering he almost made Sonic lose someone so important to him and Sonic ends up talking it out with him and helps him despite everything.
So I’m thinking about this AU where Shadow gets ambushed by GUN agents and there we see that soldier lady (who was very efficient in messing up everybody’s plans😭😭go queen, I Stan her) and he’s in a terrorgation room with no cuffs, nothing, just her and him. She approaches him saying that he wouldn’t have come willingly because he most likely would’ve thought they were ambushing him anywYs blah blah blah- we get to the point where she guilt-trips him using Maria, him almost destroying millions of innocent lives, and then she brings up Sonic and how he put aside his hatred and helped him instead and how good of person Sonic is and that Shadow didn’t deserve someone like Sonic to be good to him- that he didn’t deserve a second chance. And she does this WELL. She doesn’t yell, she’s calm and she has such a sure face that it messes with Shadow despite him trying really hard to not take everything to heart and agreeing WITH it. She says that he could EARN that second chance if he starts helping GUN because “today’s GUN isn’t the same GUN as before”. And adds,
“if not for the world, then for her.”
And THAT gets him on board, although still reluctant.
Then we can time skip into shadow having a REALLY bad time where he’s constantly switching from mission to mission to fighting in an underground illegal fighting ring because he can’t stand being at GUN’s room for him and he needs to let out his emotions. He’s in between fighting as an agent and as a bloodied fighter(he lets himself get beat bc he thinks he deserves it) and he’s seeing hallucinations of Maria but also starts to see hallucinations of Sonic and he begins to consume his mind because why??? Why help him??? Why console him? Why choose to understand him? Why did he smile at him knowing all the things he’s done? Why laugh and talk with him like they’ve known each other forever?
And he CANNOT get Sonic out of his mind. He’ll be fighting bad guys on missions and Sonic’s smile flashes or he can hear him laugh. And shadow doesn’t know how to feel about it. He barely knows the guy!!! But it doesn’t click until he gets a talk from someone in the locker room for the fighting ring where she tells him, “when someone looks at you with care even though you’ve done nothing to deserve it… it’s hard not to think about warmth after years of freezing.”
And it clicks. Sonic’s the only other warmth he’s felt besides Maria. But Sonic’s different, he isn’t someone to be like family- like Maria, it’s something else entirely and he’s so confused at the feeling. But he thinks of him anyway. And he dreams of new times with him anyway. And he’ll never plan to visit him.
Until a new foe arrives which causes the Sonic team+ Amy (so excited to see her!!)+ Shadow & GUN. Sonic and Amy are getting along fine but Sonic is just. So. Glad that Shadow is in fact alive. He introduces her, they talk about what happened but Sonic is all like “it’s all in the past, who cares??!!!!!” “Sonic, he almost killed Tom and you tried to kill him” “it’s all in the past!!!!!”
And they get to develop their relationship and Sonic’s talking about how Shadow needs to go “popular place” and needs to do “trendy cool thing” because he’s “uncultured to a horrifying degree”. They get to have teamwork, argue with each other, reconcile, laugh, bond, and it’s NOTHING like these boys have felt before. It’s so easy to share with each other but also have some sort of friendly rivalry and continue to push themselves to impress one another. It’s sportsmanship , it’s friendship, it’s romantic(tho they won’t admit it), it’s a genuine connection.
And maybe. HEAR ME OUT PLEASE. MAYBE. they have a dance scene. THIS ISNT CRAZY. THEY SHOWED SHADOW DOESNT MIND DANCING AND SONIC FUCKING LOVES IT!!!! SO!!!!!
ITS A ROMANTIC LYRICS BUT REALLY GOOD MUSIC TYPE OF SONG (think of “Ma Meilluere Ennemie” from Arcane which is SO THEM btw) BUT ANYWAYS.
I just really hope we see Shadow and Sonic become friends that everyone knows as complicated but They still Care. For one another even if they don’t want to admit it.
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200markies · 2 days ago
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Heyyy!! I love your work <3 Can you write a 'Mark is the type of boyfriend to...' and/or something about: idol!mark and reader as a regular person (full time job+college student) maybe with a little bit o angst since they are so different from each other etc?
    mark ♡ is the type of boyfriend to ... ⁺
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mark soft hours & headcanons. all are fictional.
pairing: mark lee x fem!reader
genre: romance, fluff
requested by anon !
author's notes: i did NOT expect all of you guys to like the jeno headcanons so much to the point that an anon requested a mark ver which convinced me enough to make another one for the week 😭 y'all do indeed enjoy the headcanon series. anyway, to the anon who is reading this, i have to be honest with you but i genuinely enjoyed writing this and i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing this. PLEASE. this took me hours to write and i don't expect JUST the anon to like this but all of you too! i can't even say "i hope you enjoy" in the author's notes now that i'm expecting a thousand notifications on my activity tab in this platform.... 🤓
p.s. let us all thank mark lee for making the most boyfriend material instagram that could ever exist.... without r_e__m___ this headcanon wouldn't be BORN!
reminding all of u guys that my ask inbox is open so don't hesitate to drop a request or an ask !!!
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mark is the type of boyfriend to write you poems whenever feels like it, or whenever it's a special occasion that's all about you. whether it be your birthday or your anniversary together, mark tries his absolute best to find all the words and combine it to make a poem that will surely make you happy. he wants to make you feel loved and safe with him, especially since he's your boyfriend.
"hey, beautiful, i left something on your desk," mark walks to you in the living room, sitting beside you while you work a deadline. you turn to him and chuckled, looking at your room which had a yellow folded note. you knew immediately that mark wrote a poem, and you can't wait to read it. you stand up to get the note on your desk, unfolding it to see an entire script of a poem which was all about how sweet your personality is. you walk back to mark, reading it while he lies his head on your shoulder to read a bit of what he wrote. "'you're so sweet that i can't stop coming back to you as if you're like candy, i take it, i'm the luckiest man in the world because of you, my fancy.'" you read the 3rd line in the 4th stanza, giving mark a little peck after you read it.
mark is the type of boyfriend to definitely rehearse being a husband to you. even though you two may not be ready yet or you can't bring yourselves to commit, he loves to do things a loyal husband would do. would you complain? no, because you loved it when mark would act that way. it's quite silly of him to do that, but trust me, you will need it when the both of you are married.
"good evening, future wifey," mark leans on your doorway while you're putting accessories to your outfit, looking at him once you heard his voice. tonight, mark is taking you out on a date, as part of his "husband rehearsals". he notices you're wearing the yves saint laurent dress mark gave you on your first anniversary, which made him smile and giggle. "looks like you're wearing your favorite dress on our date today, hm?" you nodded, giggling softly. "you truly love rehearsing your husband duties, it's silly." you say, walking to him as you put on your fur coat and kissed him on the lips. "it's not silly when you're gonna need more of me acting like this when we get married."
mark is the type of person who tends to stay with you almost every hour of the day. even when you don't need him, he's gonna be beside you until sunset, he can work with you, or he can cuddle, or he can comfort you while you work. (that's for later) he wants to keep you close to him no matter what, so that he could take care or help you whenever something happens. it's his obligation, and he's happy to take it.
"what... are you doing?" you look up at mark who's massaging your legs, confused and a little startled at the sensations he's giving you. he's right in front of you, trying his best to probably keep you soothed and comfortable while he has nothing to do for the day. you couldn't even make him leave because, you can admit, you loved this. "i know how tired you are after the gala you had with your friends, and i'm trying to soothe you so that you won't feel any more pain walking later. i know you love it, baby." he continues massaging you while you're working, making you giggle as you stared at him. "well, matter of fact... your massages are doing great work."
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©️ 200markies / jyanihaes, 2024
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unar-mage-ddon · 2 days ago
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been thinking about brain (as if i don't think about him constantly already) and lately i always end up coming back to this one little thing that i promise isn't meant to be a burn against him — what's this guy's friend situation like?
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these two lines in particular ("friends. cool." and "friendship's a beautiful thing." respectively) stick out the most, especially the second one because in japanese, the literal meaning is more like, "friendship's great; makes me jealous." which i've always found kind of interesting at this stage of the game because that kinda implies he still doesn't consider the other union leaders his friends yet, right?
so i went digging a little to see if he ever referred to them as such and came up with these two—
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—where he uses the word 仲間 in reference to them, the first one referring to player. it can mean "friend," but it's a little closer to "ally" or like "acquaintance" — it's the same word you'd use to refer to coworkers or fishing buddies, people you'd hang out with or are friendly towards but not necessarily confide in, that sorta thing. close, but there's a slight difference.
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(there's also this line — "well, since your friend is here and the makeup of this world is complicated, i'll try to keep things simple..." — where he refers to player as お友達, with the お at the beginning being a polite way to say "your friend." not really related to the rest of the post, i just think it's kinda funny since he normally speaks so casually)
anyway, all of this, to me, comes across as him keeping himself kind of emotionally distant from the others, not really letting himself think of them as more than just "allies working towards the same goal" for one reason or another.
and then the fountain scene happens:
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his very last line in the game and he finally calls ephemer, at least, his friend. but it's not 友達, it's not even 友人; the word he uses is 親友, which is what you'd use for close friends — for all intents and purposes, best friend.
(自慢 means pride or to boast by the way. he's so proud of his best friend. i'm going to start eating glass)
so . i don't have a point to make with any of this i just wanted to share my thoughts from the last two days. brain makes me really emotional ok
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wyvernspirit · 2 hours ago
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Cleo is the only non male in third life! It automatically fails the Bechdel-Wallace test!
(Which, by the way, is its full name that I should have used on the tierlist but it was only meant to be a haha funny moment so I didnt do more research into it until after which is my mistake
And again I'm putting this out here THIS TIERLIST WAS/IS A JOKE /light-hearted)
To pass the Bechdel-Wallace test a piece of media must have at minimum two female characters
That talk to each other
About something other than a man
But also since making this tierlist its been brought to my attention that maybe Double Life also does not pass the Bechdel-Wallace test if only because the Bechdel-Wallace test does not seem to account for the vagueity of "Non-male" in gender queer, which Cleo I believe would fall under as they use She/they pronouns
HOWEVER
The original origin point of the Bechdel-Wallace test was that it came from Alison Bechdel's comic strip, Dykes to Watch Out For.
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and therefore "The context of the strip may have referred to alienation of queer women in film and entertainment, where the only possible way for a queer woman to imagine any of the characters in any film may also be queer was if they satisfied the requirements of the test." (Wikipedia Dec.24 2024)
In which if we think of it that way ALL the life series' pass because all these bitches be dramatic queer characters lol / j
But again-
"I mean, when I wrote that cartoon in 1985—almost 30 years ago—it was just a little lesbian joke in an alternative feminist newspaper-" Alison Bechdel (Morlan, Kinsee July 23, 2014 "Comic-Con vs. the Bechdel Test". San Diego City Beat)
-if we take it strictly from a sapphic (Non men in love with another non men) viewpoint i.e from queer women looking to find representation third life still can't pass because it's just Cleo
Now Double Life is also questionable because of the soulmates and the two nonmen (Pearl and Cleo) being intricately linked because of Scott (a man) however there is something inherently queer in that dynamic aswell. Like a) Scott and Cleo choosing to literally defy destiny and become each other's chosen soulmates is so queer and b) it's a queer platonic relationship (or it reads that way to me anyways)
And also Double Life is my favourite it gets every pass I want it to get /light-hearted, joke
So Though This Whole Thing Was A Joke
I hope maybe everyone reading this has learned a little about queer history! It's something I'm passionate about and honestly I probably could make a whole paper on the history of the Bechdel-Wallace test and Alison Bechdel and this spefic comic stripe
I won't though, if only because I don't currently have the time, as it's 1 am as I type this 😅
Hope that answers your question!
My life series smp rankings
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bokutosbabe · 11 hours ago
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Hi! Here for the More than a married couple (but not lovers) event. That's such a GREAT IDEA!! So sweet😭💖
The character I chose is Michael 🍓🍦
Also kudos to you for starting another event even though you're still writing asks! you're really spoiling us💕
i really enjoyed doing the last event, tysm!!
A Michael Kaiser Strawberry Sundae...
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જ⁀♡⊹。° every version of yourself
♡ a/n — for my more than a married couple event :)
♡ content — michael kaiser x gn! reader, gn! reader, set in a high school so no funny buisness, supposed to be kinda unrequited love?, kaiser's own insecurities, takes you through the length of the simulation, kaiser still plays soccer, kaiser in HS if he wasn't traumatized :))), still cocky though, an little flirty, nickname like 'spouse' used, popular! kaiser, quiet! shy! reader
♡ synopsis — being paired with michael kaiser may be the worst thing to ever happen to you...or so you think
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The classroom buzzed with anticipation as the names were called out. Each pair announced felt like a small shockwave in the room, but the real chaos came when your name was read.
“And finally... Michael Kaiser and Y/N.”
The gasps, whispers, and sharp glares that followed made you shrink in your seat. Everyone’s eyes darted between you and the blonde at the back of the room, who leaned lazily against his chair, unfazed.
Kaiser didn’t even look your way. Typical. Why would he? Michael Kaiser wasn’t just a soccer prodigy; he was the center of attention everywhere he went. The school’s golden boy. The one every girl wanted to be paired with. And somehow... you, the average nobody, ended up in the simulation with him.
“Well,” Kaiser said finally, standing and giving a theatrical stretch. He smirked as if this was all a game, his piercing blue eyes sweeping over the room like he’d already won something. “Guess I’ll be seeing a lot more of you.”
Your cheeks burned as laughter rippled through the room. His tone was light, teasing, but it only made the pit in your stomach grow. How were you supposed to survive an entire month living with Michael Kaiser?
The simulation began with a flurry of paperwork and rules. You were handed a key to a mock apartment and a thick packet outlining tasks you’d need to complete as a "couple" to pass. Cooking meals together, managing a budget, planning dates—it all felt bizarre. But the strangest part? Being tied to Michael Kaiser for every waking moment.
The apartment itself was small but cozy. Two bedrooms flanked a shared living space, and the kitchenette barely fit two people at a time. You stood awkwardly by the door as Kaiser strolled in like he owned the place. He dropped his duffel bag on the couch and turned to you with that signature smirk.
“Well, spouse, welcome home,” he drawled, tossing his duffel onto the larger bedroom’s bed without hesitation. “Don’t worry, I won’t invade your room. You’ll have all the space you need to miss me.”
Your brow furrowed. “Pretty confident about claiming the bigger room.”
He shrugged with a grin. “Call it a perk of being me.”
Typical Kaiser. You rolled your eyes but didn’t push it further. How were you supposed to survive an entire month living with someone so… larger than life?
The first week was… manageable, mostly because Kaiser didn’t seem to take the simulation seriously. He’d breeze through tasks with minimal effort, brushing off your attempts at cooperation.
“Budgeting? Just write whatever, I don’t care,” he’d said with a shrug one afternoon.
“Kaiser, we lose points if we don’t do it properly,” you insisted, tapping the form with your pen.
He rolled his eyes but leaned over anyway, closer than necessary, close enough to where his musky cologne made it hard to think. He hummed as he glanced at the page. “Fine. Put down ‘caviar’ and ‘gold-encrusted steak.’ That’ll impress the evaluators.”
You glared at him, but he just laughed. It was infuriating, how easy everything seemed to him.
Still, there were glimpses of something more.
Like the time you cooked dinner together. It was one of the mandatory tasks, and Kaiser insisted on doing as little as possible—until you nearly sliced your hand while chopping vegetables.
“Careful!” He grabbed your wrist, his touch surprisingly gentle. For a moment, his usual bravado disappeared, replaced by something softer.
You were shocked, but not by his sudden loudness or his worry. No, you were shocked by watching the point value on your living room wall go up.
Oh so being a decent person and taking care of someone got you points? How silly...kind of.
“I’m fine,” you mumbled, pulling away.
“Yeah, well, try not to bleed all over the food. I’m not eating anything with extra seasoning,” he teased, smirking as he handed you a safer task.
And just like that, the moment was gone.
By the second week, you started to notice cracks in his perfect façade.
It happened late one night when you couldn’t sleep. You wandered into the living room to grab some water, only to find Kaiser sitting by the window, staring out at the city lights. His usual confident posture was gone, replaced by something almost… scared, like a child that's been missing their mother just a little too long.
“Couldn’t sleep either?” you asked hesitantly.
What were you doing? Yes, this project required interacting with each other, but you could have ignored him.
What was it about Michael Kaiser that made you act so...unlike yourself?
He didn’t answer right away, his profile illuminated by the faint glow of the streetlamps. Finally, he spoke. “Do you ever feel like people only see what they want to see?”
You blinked. “What do you mean?”
He glanced at you then, his blue eyes unreadable. “Forget it. Go back to bed.”
But you couldn’t forget it. The question lingered, and for the first time, you wondered if Michael Kaiser—the golden boy everyone adored—might be lonelier than he let on.
Things began to shift in the third week.
It was subtle at first. The way Kaiser’s teasing softened, the way he started helping more with the tasks instead of leaving everything to you. He even started calling you by your name instead of “spouse” or other mocking nicknames.
And then there were the moments where he’d look at you—not with the cocky smirk he wore like armor, but with something quieter, almost vulnerable.
You didn’t know what to make of it. You’d spent so long nursing your one-sided crush, convinced he’d never see you the way you saw him. And maybe he didn’t. Maybe you were imagining things.
But then came the final task: planning a “date night.”
You went all out, wanting to ace the simulation. You planned a picnic under the stars, complete with fairy lights and a playlist of soft, dreamy songs. Kaiser didn’t seem particularly invested at first, but when he saw the setup, his eyes lit up with genuine surprise.
“You did all this?” he asked, looking almost impressed.
You shrugged, trying to play it cool, but probably just looking like a dork who took this a little too seriously, “It’s for the grade.”
“Right,” he said, though his tone was softer than usual. And for a moment, Michael Kaiser looked truly upset by what you said...but why?
The night was quiet and peaceful, the two of you sitting side by side on the blanket. For once, Kaiser wasn’t filling the silence with jokes or teasing remarks. Instead, he turned to you, his expression uncharacteristically serious.
“You’re not what I expected,” he said suddenly.
You blinked. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I thought this whole thing would be a waste of time,” he admitted. “But… you’re different. You’re real.”
Your heart skipped a beat. “Michael…”
He smirked then, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Don’t look at me like that. You’ll give me the wrong idea.”
But maybe, just maybe, the idea wasn’t so wrong after all.
The final week of the simulation was a blur of evaluations and last-minute tasks, but something had shifted irrevocably between you and Kaiser. He wasn’t just the golden boy anymore. He was Michael—arrogant, infuriating, but also thoughtful and surprisingly kind in his own way.
On the last night in the apartment, you found yourself standing in the kitchen, packing up your things. Kaiser leaned against the counter, watching you with an unreadable expression.
“So, this is it, huh?” he said, his voice unusually quiet as he stared into the almost empty cabinet, only filled with the stupid matching couples cups he got after an argument that lost you two points in the first week.
“Yeah,” you said, not trusting yourself to say more. What else could you say? 'Oh Michael, I love you and expect you to marry me!'
You'd rather die than be shot down like that.
He hesitated, then reached out to tilt your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze. “You know,” he said softly, “you’re kind of impossible to forget.”
Your breath hitched. “Michael—”
“Don’t,” he said, his smirk returning, though his eyes betrayed something deeper. “I’ll see you around, yeah?”
And just like that, he was gone.
Leaving those stupid cups behind.
Graduation loomed over you like a terrifying monster. It'd been a week since you'd spoken to Kaiser, both of you being too absorbed in your own lives. But you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had been left unsaid. Until one day, days later, you found a note slipped into your locker. It was short, written in Kaiser’s unmistakable scrawl:
"I wasn’t joking when I said you were impossible to forget. Let me prove it. Dinner?"
Your heart raced as you read the words. Maybe, just maybe, the idea wasn’t so wrong after all.
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this was the first one i wrote for this event so i hope this layout is okay!
i hope you liked it!
likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!
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